I fear I may perish from sleep deprivation soon. My level of exhaustion rivals that of the early days of Ethan's life. I cannot think straight. My eyes are burning. My head is hurting. My whole body feels as though it's weighted down by massive weights tied to my neck, arms, legs, etc. I don't know how much longer I can endure.....
Remember when Dylan was sleeping until 3:30 or even 5:30? I do. It seems like ages ago. Many, many ages ago. Those days quickly begin to diminish upon my return to the working world. I now loathe the working world. I loathe it because, well, it's impossible to function on so little sleep and still be a productive member of the team. One may be able to conclude I was in a recent fight based on the large, black bags that adorn my eyes. I am in a state of survival. I suppose they call this motherhood.
So this every two hours starting at 11:30 has got to stop. I'm desperate for a solution. So desperate that I'm going to start formula TOMORROW. A week and a half earlier than I had intended. And then, I'm going to pray. And pray. And pray. Each night before I go to sleep, I'm going to pray that he sleeps longer. I know that they say giving baby formula won't make him sleep longer. And the truth is, I'm not giving it to him before bed. I'm giving him a bottle or two during the day.
They also say formula-fed babies sleep longer. It's worth a shot, and I was going to quit pumping at 6 months anyway. Maybe you can find it in your heart to pray, too.
Dylan can move. I mean, he can inch worm is tiny, little, I'm-still-wearing-three-month-clothes self across the damn room. And no, he may not be quick as lightning, but any one with kids knows that it doesn't take them long to get that way. My goodness, I didn't see it coming. You'd think I would, but I didn't. He still seems so small. So tiny. So my little baby. He's not supposed to grow up this fast. Yet he is. And all I get to do is sit on the sidelines and watch him keep right on going. When I get to watch him. Because the majority of my days are here. At work. Blah.