Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Just in case....we die.

When we became parents, we didn't really go through the whole what-happens-if-we-die thing. I've thought about it over the years and we've talked about it....some. But we never solidified anything. We never set our ideas into motion.

Probably because it scares the hell out of me to plan for our own demise.

Nevertheless, if we don't plan and the unthinkable were to happen, our children would become wards of the court until a permanent solution could be reached. Sure, my in-laws would hands down take them in such an event, but they'd have to crawl through webs of red tape to get there. I don't want that for them. And I definitely don't want that uncertainty for my children.

The trouble is, I don't have anyone I would trust to raise my boys. Not on my side. And my mother-in-law has expressed that she feels her age isn't appropriate for raising babies. Nor does she want to spend the rest of her life on Earth raising little ones. I don't blame her.

So that leaves the brothers. Clint's brothers.

His oldest little brother is my age. He's still in school and moves more times that I ever have. He's trying to get things together and is working so hard, but he's not stable. Nor does he wish to have kids.

His youngest little brother lives in Nashville. He owns a house. He's dating, but no marriage in sight right now. He teaches voice and music and directs a church choir. Of the two, he is the smartest choice. I know unequivocally that he would care for my children and raise them as if they were his own. I know he would take it seriously. And I know his mother would do anything she could to help him.

While it's not my ideal, it's the best option I have and it's a good option. I contemplated asking my best friend for while. She has two children close in age to my own. However, not only would it be difficult to love children you're unrelated to but also it's likely she may move out of state eventually. I wouldn't want the boys to be separated from their family. They would need stability and love.

And so, we asked the youngest brother. He accepted. Now we have to go through the process of making everything official. What a strange thing to plan your own death.


  1. We need to do this too. My dad keeps telling me that I HAVE to do a will. Not only should we but because of business things, we really do have to do it. Maybe this summer? Randy and I really need to focus on it and work on it and finding the time to do it is not easy...

  2. I'm glad he accepted. He does sound like a very good choice. Now go get that paperwork done!

  3. I have to say that I think you made an excellent choice. =) I think if the need ever arose he would do a great job with the boys.

  4. That is really strange to plan, but good that you are doing so!

    I disagree though when you say "it be difficult to love children you're unrelated to" I'm not related to my friends kids but I'm their godmother-and I love them as my own and would even if I had to take care of them (god-forbid!)

  5. Talking about what would happen in the bad events is one of the hardest things to do, but it's also one of the most responsible things. As an insurance agent, I want to applaud y'all for taking the steps to make things official. It's one less piece of turmoil if the worst comes to fruition, but hopefully your plans will never need to be executed.